The Feelings Behind is an article on emotions

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The Feelings Behind

By Oyvind Hennum

To make your emotional awareness grow will benefit you a lot.

People who have a very mental attitude toward everything in their lives will be perceived as just that—very mental. It is not an attitude that invites happiness and good fortune in your life. People who are working only from the head can often seem very distant and cold. You need to involve emotions in your life.

That will also invite more people into your life, more people mean more energy, and that is a sign that you are able to handle more energy.

You can see your ability to be around people as an advantage in your life because people also represent opportunities for friendship, love, and business and work relationships. Friendship is the key here because your friends give you support and make you feel that you belong somewhere, even if your new business idea may not be an immediate success.

Being emotionally aware makes it that much easier to approach you, and it makes you generally open toward people. By being emotionally aware, I mean that you are aware how you are feeling. People who live most of their lives from the head are not.

Feelings are usually a sensation you have in your stomach and chest area and in the energy field around you body. You discover your feelings when you allow yourself to breathe out and relax. It is the feeling that you will discover after saying to yourself that this is OK.

It’s OK to have a feeling that is more subtle and gentle than the stronger feelings that most people can relate to—feelings of sorrow, when someone dies, feeling heartbroken or lovesick when in love, the feeling of being in love and the whole world seems pink, and the feelings of anger which can arise in a traffic jam or when somebody jumps the cue or someone takes something that belongs to you.

Most people can recognize their feelings when they are this strong but not the more subtle ones that you always have.


Your feelings can be a great guide for you. Everybody knows words like “hunch” or “intuition.” That is the subtle feeling you get in your stomach or heart. This is also called following your heart or trusting your feelings.

This is a challenge in the beginning because you are probably used to thinking and calculating everything without feeling. I am not saying that you must start trusting your own feelings without thoughts and consider it every time you make a choice. To put it simply: Your way in making choices is to trust that the first thing that comes to you is usually the right one. Your first hunch, thought, or feeling is usually the right one.

You can practice by letting yourself be led by your intuition in choices where you feel that not very much is at risk. Start to follow it and let yourself be led. Nine out of ten times, you will see that it is right. This is trusting your feelings. Feeling is the fuel of life; it is what makes life vital and juicy.

It makes you alive! People who constantly repress their feelings usually cut off their energy at some level and become very flat and robot-like.

When you start to involve emotions in your life, you may think that you become unstable and unreliable because your feelings about things are changing. What I am telling you here is not to follow all your feelings, especially not the negative ones.

It will not bring you closer to telling your spouse or boss to fuck off and throw him or her out or quit your job on the spot. If you do this, be sure to have a backup so you can still pay your rent this month!

Immediately following all your feelings is not constructive; you need to be clear which ones you want to follow. Again, you are in charge and responsible.

Allowing yourself to feel how you actually feel, and recognizing and accepting it, is what you need to do. From there on, you can more clearly see where you want to go or what you want to do with the feelings you have.

Sometimes, it can be more constructive to go home to your bedroom and rant and scream and beat the pillows or the mattress than to tell your boss to fuck off—at least as long as you are looking for another source of income.

Accepting that you have emotions and learn how to express them in a constructive and safe way is an advantage for you because you will feel free and open instead of closed and afraid of the emotions.

When you understand, accept, and express your emotions, you are in a flow with life, and you are open for people and ideas to come into your life.

Learning to understand and express emotions may be more difficult for some people and you may need guidance on the subject.

I suggest you use all available sources on psychology, therapy and emotional intelligence, and also to do personal growth groups or programs.

Copyright (c) 2005



About the author:

Oyvind Hennum runs the web site

The site contains book reviews, articles, biographies, free e-books, motivational quotes, abundance affirmations, practical tips, success tests, budgeting advice and resource directory.

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I will now introduce you to the concept of EQ,- Emotional Intelligence

EQ is an important part of your road to success. You would not be able to experience different feelings like joy and satisfaction, without having any form of emotional intelligence. You would not be able to discriminate between good and bad feelings and why they occur.


Emotional intelligence is the ability of making conscious choices of thoughts, feelings, and actions when relating with yourself and others. It is essential in your relationships with your family, friends and colleagues.

According to the psychological definition , there is 5 different characteristics who defines Emotional Intelligence

1. Self-awareness--knowing your emotions, recognizing feelings as they occur, and discriminating between them

2. Mood management--handling feelings so they're relevant to the current situation and you react appropriately

3. Self-motivation--"gathering up" your feelings and directing yourself towards a goal, despite self-doubt, inertia, and impulsiveness

4. Empathy--recognizing feelings in others and tuning into their verbal and nonverbal cues

5. Managing relationships--handling interpersonal interaction, conflict resolution, and negotiations

If you want to know more about EQ, click here. Or here:

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